The Only Run I've Ever Regretted (Little Diva is ok, but was hit by a car)

You will recall from yesterday's post, that hubby and I had a 20 mile running date yesterday. I was tired and exhausted, as was hubby all afternoon. Little Diva asked me three times that afternoon if we could right her bike down to Walgreens to get some candy. She has been riding her bike with me all summer, while I run 3-6 miles. It has a blast and she is always so excited to be spending time together and sharing my runs. My upper legs weren't working well and I was mentally tired, but I decided to put on another running outfit (and Bondi Band!) and go out with her. Hubby told me I was crazy!

I loaded up her wallet with $3 worth of quarters, so that she could pick out some treats. We filled her bike basket with the wallet and our water bottles and snapped this quick photo.

We headed in our roundabout route to Walgreens. I don't like to take her down the main roads, because there are hills and I worry about her going to fast on the sidewalk. There are also a lot of cross-streets and even though she waits for me to give her the ok to cross to the next portion of the sidewalk, it still freaks me out a bit. So, we headed out on our 1 1/2 mile journey to Walgreens and along the bike path. She gets a kick out of putting her bike in the bike stand and entering the pharmacy with her bike helmet on. She chose a Dove candy bar and some Pop Rocks. She ate some chocolate and downed some water and we were headed back home for the second half of our journey.

We continued down the bike path and I kept telling her how awesome she is doing on her bike and what a good listener she is while she's on it. We made the turn into our neighborhood and down a private drive that is filled with about 20 condos. We use to live in the same condo community until she was one-and-a-half. These condos were directly behind where we use to live and there are a lot of older people residing there, as they are only one story. A lot of the retired folks were outside, sitting in lawn chairs or grilling out. This is the only portion of our journey where there aren't sidewalks and that isn't a bike path. I was running against traffic, which her about a compact car's length in front of me. Now that I think of it, we probably should have been on the right side of the street. I was thinking it was safer, just like when I'm running, but I was wrong.

I saw a truck coming at only about 5-10 MPH and I said, "There's a car coming, stay to the side." She saw it and moved a little to the left. Then she went about a foot to the right and it appeared that the truck almost angled into her. She hit the front of the truck (near the liscense plate) and the truck continued to roll for a few feet. I was seeing everything in slow motion as she was underneath the front half of the truck with her bike on top of her.

I started screaming. I feared the worse. I couldn't control the situation. She wasn't crying, she just kept repeating, "I'm ok, I'm ok". I pulled her out from underneath the bike and carried over to a nearby lawn. I just held her. I didn't even really look her over and I was just sobbing and screaming. I was in complete shock. I looked back at her bike and it was under the car, her shoe was off to the side of the road, her bike basket and contents were ripped off the bike and I found out later that the bell was even ripped off.

As I held her and screamed, someone that was outside grilling had gone inside and had his wife call 911. He came out and held me and Little Diva. And, looked her over for me, since I wasn't thinking straight. she just had some scrapes, cuts and bruises. It was amazing. He looked over her neck and and asked her some questions, which she answered fine. I asked him if he thought it was ok to take her helmet off, and we did. I realized that the outside of the helmet was cracked and ripped.

Within two minutes there were at least a half dozen police officers and an ambulance. Most of the condominium community was outside watching us as the sirens blared. The man who called 911 kept repeating to me that I did nothing wrong. It was a private drive and I was doing the right thing by not having her on the main roads or in the road. He told me that I was a good mom and just kept hugging me. Little Diva kept saying, "Mom, I'm ok.". Let's just say, I was not at my best.

The nice couple dialed my home number so that I could reach hubby. He doesn't typically answer the phone, especially if it's an unfamiliar number. I told him to pick up the phone and that she was ok, but was hit by a car. We spoke briefly. He piled Little Dude in the car and drove to the other end of the neighborhood. They showed up barefoot.

The police asked me fifty million questions and kept allowing me to go back to her in the grass to comfort her. I think he just thought I needed the comfort! A really elderly man was consoling Little Diva in the grass and telling her awesome it was that she was out riding her bike with her mom and how special that was. The stranger hugged me kissed my neck and reminded me that everything was going to be ok. I hugged the strangers and thanked them for their support and kindness. They told us to call and that Little Diva needs to stop by the next time we're running/riding through.

The man that was driving the truck said that he saw me, but didn't see her. I'm still not sure what happened. But, it was very, very scary.

The police offered to unlock hubbys car and put Little Diva's bike and belongs in the back. Another police officer gave her a sweet teddy bear to comfort her.

The emergency crew checked her out and said that she was ok and would just probably be sore the next day. They advised us to still head to the hospital to get her checked out. We piled in the car and drove to the new emergency center in our mid-size town. They saw her right away and checked her vital signs. She checked out just fine and gave her a gift certificate to Culver's. She was happy that we could go get some ice cream soon!

She says that she'll get back on her bike and still wants to ride with me. This makes me relieved. She's all smiles, as usual and proves to me just how resiliant she is. She's very confident and typically not hesitant to do anything. I'm glad to see that this hopefully has not changed.

We will be heading to Target shortly to let her pick out a cool, new bike helmet ... and probably a new bike. It's pretty banged up.

I never regret heading outside for a run or spending quality time with my children. But, I do regret yesterday's run. I am still torn-up and feel guilty. Why, I'm not sure. I feel that as her mom I should've been able to control the situation. If I had warned her a little bit earlier that the car was coming, would that have made a difference? If I had been another foot or two closer to her, would I have been able to stop this from happening? Should we have been on the other side of the road? I'm really worried that when people hear our story, that they'll think that I was dragging my child along with me on another run, trying to fit in some more miles. The girly just wanted to go get some candy and spend time with her mom.